Get out of the road: Just after 5 p.m. Monday, several people called police about a woman driving so slowly through the intersection of Broadway Avenue and Redmond Street that other cars had to swerve around her to get past. When an officer arrived on scene and opened her door to administer field sobriety tests, she forgot to put the car in park, so the officer had to do it for her. She was taken to St. John’s Medical Center for treatment and released after being charged with her first DUI.
Leave it at home: A man came to the Teton County Courthouse for sentencing Tuesday, but found himself in trouble before he even learned his punishment for the previous crime. As he walked through the security checkpoint, the officers found something he might have wanted to leave at home: his marijuana pipe.
Better take a walk: An officer responded Thursday to reports of a drunken man who had fallen on Buffalo Way. Though people tried to help him, he instead attempted to hop on his bike and ride away. When he couldn’t mount his bicycle he started pushing it along the street rather than the sidewalk. An officer flashed his lights and tried to help the man on to said sidewalk, but when the man became uncooperative, he was arrested on a charge of public intoxication.
It’s worse than you think: A driver reported to police that damage to the owner’s car had been from a keying, but the responding officer determined that the damage was from a hit-and-run driver. Police have no leads.
A cold bus stop: A recently completed bus stop at Jackson Hole Middle School is going to need some work after a yet-uncaught vandal Friday morning shattered one of the large glass panels that formed its wall. The $1,000 glass panel had recently been installed. Officers are reviewing surveillance video footage, but no suspects have been identified.
Polar bear club: A naked man was reported to police Friday for bathing himself “in the river.” The reporting party thought the naked man was on drugs. After assessment, the responding officer threw a blanket over him and helped him warm up.
It was stolen, I swear: On Nov. 19, a woman reported to police that her wedding ring had been stolen from her hotel room. Officers responded and spoke with woman, but they were unable to develop any leads on who the purloiner might be. They have not determined whether this is a case of theft or one of a misplaced valuable.